The Deadline... failure.

Well, I wasn't able to make my deadline. Though I have a somewhat valid excuse. My friend is visiting us from Japan and I've been working on getting our house together as well as planning and taking her places. So... my priorities somewhat shifted for the week.
However, I DID finish the base drawing. So, here is what I have.
I will start to color it next week after she leaves back for Japan.
I hope to get a lot of good work done after that.
I've learned one thing though: Take your circumstances into consideration when setting goals!
That being said. don't expect any finished work by the end of the week. Ha ha!

The goal and the deadline.

I felt it time to sit down and actually get some blog on my blog. Granted, I'm always super excited whenever I finish a picture, but I think it's important to take the time and reflect once and a while.

Upon reviewing my portfolio with Danielle for this springs Art Carreer Concern's class I realized that most of the finished work I have consists of portraits! I never thought of myself as a portrait artist, but whether it was for a class or just characters from my stories, a majority were in fact PORTRAITS!

So, Danielle picked a couple that would be good for a series, but I've given myself the challenge of making a series of posters. If the're good, I hope that I will be able to use them for the class. I told Danielle this, but my suspicion is that portraits are easier, conceptually for me, and so I think that's why I gravitate towards them for projects. To counter this, I plan on making these posters full scenes, consisting of full, or mostly full bodied characters as well as scenery and in full color!
There's the goal people! It's written and now I just have to accomplish it!

The first chapter of the textbook for the class focuses a lot on setting goals and organization. One of the steps is to write out long term and short term goals, then pinpointing requirements to accomplish them and scheduling deadlines for each. So, above is the goal people.
I will try to finish one poster each week starting today! There's the deadline. Wish me luck!

On a side note..
Here's a finished piece!

New stuff.

So, I FINALLY finished the Nocchi chalk drawing. Yay!

I'm pretty darn happy with it. ^-^

I've had no art classes this semester and I gotta say, it's been pretty grueling. I miss having art as part of my mandatory work load. Still, I've been able to accomplish a bit of work here and there. 

Below are a few sketches I did between solving math problems and making anatomy flash cards. 

I lied. This one I actually started working on during church service. I'm planing to color it with my colored inks.
I haven't been able to play with those as much as I want to.

This one I'm going to convert into a pastel poster for my little sister who is in LOVE with the Ratchet and Clank games.

 

I'm thinking about making a Rin Kagamine costume... But that's a project for the FAR future.

More Chalk Art.... NOCHI!

Late night... got back from work close to 9:00. As I sat at my computer I tried in vain to force my brain into homework mode. My brain's retaliation was... draw Nochi! My brain won out and I began a pastel drawing from a photo. There's still quite a bit to be done, but here 'is the progress that has been made on it since that night.
I plan on bringing the square pattern across the entire width of the paper in gradation, like one of the effects from Perfume's Computer City music video. (The image is from 2:11)

Chalk Art!!

I drew this plane for my boss's son's room with chalk pastels. (Thank you Alex for the blue!)

Baggage

So, I've been thinking about baggage a lot and started a couple of chalk drawings with it as a motif. I think it's an interesting thing because metaphorically it's something that is so relateable and meaningful to anyone. 

We all have our own bad experiences in life and that "baggage" can be dealt with in so, so, so many ways. We can lug it around, leave it, toss it, sit on it or even dump it on someone else!

Another funny thing about it, is that when you are actually traveling your baggage is vital! I remember almost losing my baggage at the airport when I first went to Japan and feeling so mortified! Then, when I came back, holding all my bags close, trying so, SO hard not to fall asleep, for fear that someone would take them. I mean, everything I needed was there: my momentous, clothing, personal care products, etc. etc.. 

So then, I wonder how baggage got such a negative connotation? 

I suppose it pertains to those who over-pack....

 Here's an in progress picture of one of the drawings I'm working on. there's not a lot of detail, but I hopefully the concept shows through pretty good.

Well, school starts tomorrow, so hopefully I am able to keep posting and don't just drop off the face of the earth again, ha ha. I hope everyone is having a wonderful summer!
Peace!

I SURVIVED!

 Sorry for dropping off the face of the world for a bit...
Everything has calmed down and my summer semester is just about over.
Here are the prints that I have made for my class.
This first set are variations on a wood block cut. I call the peice "Revalation"

Next are a a linoleum print.

These are each copper plate tests for different techniques.

 This is a sharpie marker etching technique.

This is a hard ground etching technique.

 

This is an aquatint etching technique.

This is a soft ground etching technique. (didn't really do anything here. it's just laying down textured items and pressing them into the plate)













This is a collagraph.... I hate these.

Hope to post more soon! I'm going to try and work like crazy during the break. Peace out!

Crunch!

I've got 2 posters to finish for my sister's wedding, I'm going to help her with table decorations tomorrow as well as working on my woodcut project and getting ahead on the rest of my classes. I've got some stuff to post, but it'll have to wait a while! Please look forward to it! I feel that if I make a promise here, that I'm more likely to follow through. ^^

Printmaking and Pro-activity.

After my first class in printmaking, I'm excited to say that I've officially started my first matrix!... I think that's what it's called anyway. I'm using the character image from a few posts down that I uploaded; the one from my comic book. I'm so excited to see how it turns out, but carving the linoleum is a lot more tiring than I thought. So, here I am posting. Haha.
Nothing like having something you HAVE to do to put you in the mode for something totally opposite the project. Ya'll are my way of refocusing and directing my energy towards being pro-active (hence the title). Thank you for your help!

I hope everyone has had a nice memorial day. God knows we all could use a little break around this time. I especially pray that is was a good day for the families of those who've lost loved ones in service.

Yeah!

(Here's the updated pic that I will be carving for the class.)

New art.

As promised, here is one of the pieces I completed during break. I wanted to draw a human with dragon characteristics. So I did this. The medium is chalk pastels on black paper.

This one I finished post break. It was originally just a pencil drawing, but I decided to try throwing some pastel on it as well. I don't have it anymore, but I can share the photo at least.

Ignition!

It's been a great couple of weeks off, and now I am starting a new semester. I've completed a lot of work and bought a bunch of art supplies which I hope to play with very soon: Dr. Ph Martin's colored ink, a pad of large bristol board as well as pastel paper. Though I didn't do as much actual artwork as I would've liked to over the break, I was still able to get a few good things rolling. My most prideful accomplishment being a comic page from a series that's been on the shelf ever since I started school.

Here's one of the panel pictures. I'm happy to see that my drawings have become less stiff in the course of my study. Even if I haven't been working on my comics in a good long while, it's nice to see that this area isn't suffering.

I've got more finished artwork that I'll post as I am able to photograph it. I don't plan on abandoning this blog now, or in the future. But I must say, 2 weeks, 1 comic series and 5 anime series later I feel refreshed and ready to go!

So, stay tuned in, and wish me luck!
Let's GO!

An argument with myself....

As I was leaving my class on Wednesday, I had a horrifying train of thoughts flash through my mind. "Art is meaningless. It doesn't help anybody. All it can do is entertain." As a Christian I know that ultimately I'm called to love and help others, so I was really disturbed by this... So I debunked it. My argument is as follows:

There are three things I know are true and biblical, so I can trust them.
1. God gives us the desires of our hearts. "Psalm 37:4 Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart."

2. God gives us our talents, whatever they are and it's up to us to find a fitting use for them. "1 Peter 4:10 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms."

3. God cares about art. When the tabernacle was being built God directed the leaders to hire an artist whom God had given the talent especially to create the articles which would be used to worship. Exodus 31:1 Then the Lord said to Moses, "See, I have chosen Bezalel son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, and I have filled him with the spirit of God, with skill, ability and knowledge in all kinds of crafts- to make artistic designs for work in gold, silver and bronze, to cut and set stones, to work in wood and to engage in all kinds of craftsmanship."

So then, my conclusion to the matter is that I am going to create art because God put a skill and ability inside of me to be creative just like HE is.

Aside from that, I also know that art DOES matter. We are surrounded by it every day and even those who don't give a flip about the visual elements, principals of design or sociological themes of art, can be impacted simply through the visual pleasure that it brings. 

Point being: Whatever way I can find to use my abilities to speak a message, help someone or give God recognition I'll find it and I'll do it. Because as long as I give my art meaning, it's not meaningless.

Burning the midnight oil... again... I need a vacation.

Tonight I celebrate with you, because like one month after the due date, I've FINALLY finished my ceramic body armor!

The painting took WAY longer than anticipated. I was really surprised because I feel like I did such a terrible job with the painting and I thought that I did really well with acrylic in my 2D design class. Maybe it's because I'm burned out... Though this semester has been fun... I do have to say that I'm ready for it to be over.
I think that mentally this semester has been a stretch for me. I've had to do lots of papers and introspection in order to complete my projects so I'm just mentally drained.
I think it was a good thing for me though. I'm the type of person who gets caught up in accomplishing a goal, or finishing a job that I take very little time to stop and recollect myself. This course and the project requirements gave me the opportunity to accomplish this.

Up late with my puppets

Hello world, after three attempts I was able to spell world right. You know what that means right? It means that it's 12:27am and I haven't written anything on my blog yet. NOOOO!
I was reading a blog of Nocchi's from Perfume, and she was posting really late at night because she couldn't sleep. I, on the other hand, really, really, really, really want to sleep but have to post on my blog so I can't. What a world we live in, huh Nocchi?
I'm here at the least favorite part of an art project.... the deadline.
I'm usually pretty good at making deadlines, not procrastinating, working consisently and working smart, instead of hard. However, something about finals, triggers all the stupid cells in my brain and I swerve into this weird zone of difficult and overly complicated projects.
This project I'm working on now, "the puppet show", started off as a simple, 4 or 5 character story.
But then, I randomly decided to veer off and do a puppet rendition of these little bible comics that I had drawn up when I was first starting to draw.
These are super fun, and I'm enjoying the project, but here we are at 12:27 and I just barely finished putting together the 16 puppets for the show. Wow....

Maybe it's that when you (and by you, I mean me)  start to invest in something that you enjoy or care about it starts to pour out of you. Which is why when ever I get to pick a project for my finals it always becomes more than I can handle within the time limit, because it's something that's been building up in me my whole life.

I'm so tired. I think that was a hundred words... good night.
Thank you for staying up with me, Thai.

Identity Theft

So here in lies my desperate attempt to blog about something, stay on topic and relate it to art somehow.
I feel that I haven't been doing a very good job thus far, but here we go!

My friend recently found out that there was a mess up somehow with his SSN and since before he was born, a sex offender has been wracking up a scroll length criminal record that applied to my friends record as well.
Since he was sixteen he's been unsuccessfully trying to get a job and wasn't able to understand why, not knowing that the whole time his background checks were coming up with red flags for acts that he did not do.
Thankfully, since he found out, he's been able to take the proper steps and the issue is being resolved.

It's sad for me to think that mistakes like that can happen and that a person's whole reputation and character can be pinned on a number.

The bible says that "A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold." So I can see how something like this happening is mortifying and why protecting your "number" is so important, but I still don't know how well I'd take it if the same thing happened to me.

As for myself, I express my thoughts and ideas through my comics and pictures. Of course, my style leans towards the Japanese manga style. So, my thought is, because it's such an easily identifiable style, would a person's impression of a different show that they've seen ruin their opinion of the work I do, or devalue my work as art?
But in reality, the style and stories of Japan has truly ingrained itself in my psyche. Just last night I had a dream that was completely in the manga style.
I drew a section of it when I woke up from the dream, and oddly enough the girl resembles a character from a show that my same friend showed me a clip of a while back... the hairstyle anyway. It would be funny if she had had an eye-patch.


















Well, I've still got my resolve, and I don't really plan on changing my whole genre for the sake of a fearful thought, but at the same time I do wish to legitimize my style so that anyone could look at it and be pulled in to see what it's about.

The Rival

The best part about writing a story is seeing how people react to the characters. Granted, I haven't had that many stories finished to the point where I can show people and experience this but this weekend, I got it!

So, let me go into a little bit of depth on this, cause I was so stoked about it. 

This is my character, Claire (the one on the front)

 

She is the traditional, "Rival" character that is mandatory for any romance comic. If you're know Japanese comics, which my mom is fairly immersed in thanks to me, you know this; you know the character; you can spot her in an instant. So, when we were watching an anime this weekend together the rival character appeared and my mom says. "Oh! it's Claire." 

I just about cried. 

I don't know if this means that I've mastered the persona of "The Rival" in Claire, or that my mom was just actually paying attention to my piddly little 30 page chapter. But the one thing I do know, is that my character was memorable, even just a little bit, and that made me very, very happy.

What's interesting about the rival and my main character, who she's rivaling, are really the two halves of who I am; Jamie is the outward expression of myself and Claire is my inward self. I wonder if my mom sees those attributes of me inside the characters?

As this story develops and I write more and more about these characters, it's nice to see that attributes are developing which others can recognize or relate to. Maybe that's why there is always a "rival" in all the romance comics? Maybe everyone can relate to combating her, or even being her.

Words Without Pictures

Sorry to rip off your blog title Carla, it would've been different if I could find my sister's camera.
Today I thought I'd share one of the hardships of my career as an art student.... Stuff gets destroyed.
Sadly, I'm finding that this is more true with my 3D artwork than my 2D, but I've had catastrophes either way.
My latest casualty is my body armor, which I cannot show a picture of because I've misplaced the camera. I'm sorry!
But, as always, looking on the bright side I know how I can make the re-do better. Props to Dave for trying to help me out, but the repair job that we did for it broke as well. It's too bad, so sad. What I'm finding out is that the fragility and (usually negatively) spontaneous aspects of 3D design are not to my liking. It's nice to be able to make a mark, and be able to simply erase it if I don't like it. Then, when I want to store the work, or transport it, it's as simple as putting it in a portfolio. Also, in regards to the firing aspect of ceramics, I'm finding that I really don't like relying on others for the completion of my work. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think that the faculty at CNM do an good job of taking care of our projects, but the period between when I've done my part and I'm waiting for the piece to be fired is like being in the emergency room or at the MVD.
Maybe at this point I'm just ranting because quite a bit has gone wrong with this project, but at the same time I haven't hated the process. I think that I am understanding more and more how the different 3D processes work and I've enjoyed them so far (with the exception of those odious coke bottle candles!).
So, here I am about to tackle this project again, hoping that what I've just shared with you will help me to understand myself and my work a little better and result in a good final outcome.
Thanks for reading!

Happy Spring Break-esizer!

Happy Spring Break everyone!
I was just about to fall asleep at my computer as I was working on a biology report when this song came on my playlist and not only did I wake up, but I finished the whole report in the span of the song!
I thought it was pretty amazing, so I wanted to share the song.
Maybe it will help you at that final moment of the day when you need a burst of energy that won't rot in your body for the next 10 years like from a Coca-cola. Haha!

My Irrational Fear of Playing Dress Up

So, I've talked about change in drawing style, change in attitudes, change in processes (sort of), so now, what about changing one's self? I'm talking in the physical appearances aspect: clothes, hair etc. I've never put a lot of effort into how I look. Anyone who knows me know's that's the case. I'm sporty, simple comfortable and casual, all of which generally do not lean towards being "girly".
I'm bringing it up because my friend is taking me tomorrow for a makeover. She says she wants to make me more girly. She won't tell me how... just to "trust her".

I don't know that I do.....

I've thought to myself that I should dress up, that I should try to be more "pretty". But I know I'm pretty, so I guess right there lies the inner conflict. Yuck! Just saying girly and pretty so much is making me agitated.
It feels like I'm trying to crawl into someone else's skin, or like I'm putting myself inside a glass case.
Whenever I try the girly thing.... people give me too much attention. Like what I was before wasn't worth looking at. I don't mind hearing, "Wow! You look beautiful!" but really what it means is, "Wow! You finally look like a girl!". Otherwise, I'd hear the same thing when I'm in my jeans and a hoodie. I guess I just don't get it. There's some loop that I'm not a part of, or some universal knowledge that is unable to penetrate  into my brain. At any rate, I don't want to go... with every ounce of my being, I do not want to go.
But I still have that nagging feeling that I should change. Is it pressure from everyone around me? I don't know.

This shouldn't be so painful for me... but it is. And, I don't know why. I'm trying to think of more to say to help myself figure it out, but nothing's coming. Changing yourself is just hard, I guess.
This is all I've got:

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. ⁴ Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." 1 Peter 3:3-4

...That's What I Want! Da da da da da...

So, my only thoughts on change for the past week have been whether or not to bust into my piggy to buy a hamburger. With my sister's wedding, my friend's baby shower, "The Big Give" series going on at church and a still looming amount of money to save up from my recent car purchases.... money's been on the mind. 

I've been kind of torn about it, since I've often prayed that God would bless me so that I can bless others. And then, BAM! My grandma gave me some money and my sister gave me some A LOT of money! But now that I'm in a bit of a financial pinch, I guess the question I'm being asked is, are you all talk or not? Do I horde it, or give it away? I gave some of it to my brother for his performance arts fundraising and I'll put more of it aside for my sister and friend's gifts. 

Giving hasn't always been a problem for me. I've given away important things to me and let them go on several occasions and felt better for it. So I guess that's not really my issue. 

Still, at the same time, I've had an overwhelming feeling, urge... need?... to save and save and save. 

Ultimately what I would love is to get some more freelance jobs and commissions  so that I can stimulate my cash inflow while still building up my artistic skills. I've been applying for tons of jobs online, but have only had one nibble and no bites so far. I'm working on an illustration project for one of the ladies at work, so maybe it's a good thing I'm not getting a ton of work, otherwise I could be overwhelmed.

At the same time I'm still trying to create and finish work for my online portfolio as well as my comics and the whole work load I'm putting on myself is becoming a bit daunting. 

I'm sorry, I feel like I'm repeating my previous blog post. I guess it's good that I'm keeping the same resolve as previously expressed though, right?

Anyway, just a post to post. I really enjoy getting my thoughts out through this blog.

I just wish I had something new to post image wise for you. I finished all my coca-cola candles, but I hate them, and they will no longer be given any space on this blog. *SHUN!*

On a fun note though. I'm thinking of purchasing the year long zoo and aquarium membership so that I can do some serious animal and landscape drawings. I think that it will be worth breaking the bank for. I just need to find someone who's willing to buy the couple's pack with me so I can get the discount. Muahahahaha! It's diabolical!

Sucess!!!

The new mold works! YAY!

An Insight from Miss Dora, Applied.

I cut my thumb with a razor blade when I was scraping away the excess wax on one of my candles. Today I took the band-aid off and something that one of my co-workers, Miss Dora, had said really clicked.....

Problems always seem worse when you put them super close, right in your face all the time.

Step back and it's not so bad.

Wax Casting Mayhem!

I'm making 9 coca-cola bottle candles for our casting project.

The beginning of this project was a bit bumpy, because I couldn't figure out how to release the wax from the plaster mold. Thank God for Karissa who was way smarter than me and, da da daaaa~, Googled it.

So, that problem being solved, the only thing that made the project difficult was the big hole in the mold. 

I got a few good candles out of it, but then I started having a problem with the wax caving in.
It started out small, and only about every other one, then progressed to the point that every candle had a huge hole in the side.
These three are actually before it got really bad.

I looked online and tried everything I could think of and then I realized... "Doy! There's a huge hole in the mold!"

It's kind of hard to see here, but there are major cracks all along the sides of the mold. I think that the wax cools closer to the top and creates a barrier so that when I add more wax it can't reach the bottom and fill in more, and then the wax cools, condenses and creates the indentation. That's my guess anyway.
So, I'm going to make a new mold. 

I actually found a line down the middle of the coke bottle that I used to make this originally! That means that it should work without a hitch this time. (Since last time the mold broke pulling the coke bottle out. I'm excited that this next one will work better.
Now, in relation to change, I'm just glad that I'm able to recognize and apply change when I see that it's necessary. Though, I wish I would've just recast it in the beginning when Danielle had suggested it. 

I guess because I had gotten a few good ones in the beginning, it took a while to register. 

Anyway, wish me luck! 

Re-focusing

Here I am. It's Friday. I'm tired, but if I can push on for just 40 more minutes and accomplish some actual work, then my day will be well spent. It seems like I'm always trying to accomplish more and more, but reach this mysterious energy sapping wall that I just smack right into and get knocked down. This semester started out with myself exercising making origami, drawing, making eating decent meals, getting sleep and staying ahead on all my projects and assignments.

Now it seems like I'm back at that stage where I'm just trying to finish my work, whether it's exceptional or not. And just try to get myself out the door on time. 

I suppose that this may root from the feeling of wanting to do everything AND be the best at it. Though I don't think this is something that is possible for the many, the thought of dropping the ball is still a very petrifying thing. Then of course there's the variables, those things that come up which I wasn't expecting; that throw off the structure of my day and allow entropy to start running it's course. 

So then, I guess what I'm getting at is this: How do you change when your circumstances keep throwing you back to square 1? "You can't change your circumstances, but you can change you." I've been told this in one form or another so many times I don't remember who said it first, but there it is. 

I'm going to push on in order to accomplish those things I set my mind to; make the necessary sacrifices (extra sleep, etc.), prioritize and change. And then, things will get done. 

This is my resolve. May God please give me the strength to stick to it. 

I like this story because it kind of illustrates how I feel every time I start to get overwhelmed, like I want to just lay down and die.

"So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, "May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them (the prophets of Baal whom Elijah had put to death)." Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day's journey into the desert. He came to a broom tree, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. " I have had enough Lord," he said, "Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors." Then he lay down under the tree and fell asleep.

All at once an angel touched him and said, "Get up and eat." He looked around, and there by his head was a cake of bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again. The angel of the Lord came back a seond time and touched him and said, " Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you." So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God.

I want some of that bread so I can go 40 days straight!

Anyway, here is what I've been working on that I posted the initial stages of a while ago, just so that you can see that I am in fact gradually making progress on my projects.

I'm plastered

Not literally of course. Haha, I had you going there for a second, right?!
No, no. What I'm talking about is literal plaster. I'm taking the first step toward making my ceramic body armor by making a form of my torso, front and back.
It all started when my dad took the bottom part of the back piece, that I had spent a good 2 hours making  on the school's mannequin earlier, and tossed it off the chair it was resting on.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
So, I knew that this wasn't going to work. I use the mannequin from school to make it, but I couldn't very well take it home with me aaaaand I'm really, really trying to save money, so I didn't want to go buy one, and!... Well, I took the drastic measure.
The thing about making a mold of yourself is that you can't do it alone. So, I turned to my family, mostly my dad. The problem is, and I really just found this out today, is that my dad and I are exactly alike. Whenever we're in task/project mode, this beastly domination comes out and in no time at all, the project was my dad's and I was helping him with it. For the front piece we screwed each other up a lot, and for the back piece we only screwed each other up a little. But either way, I got what I needed, a base to support my clay at my house, in my budget and with my form. Check it out.

As you can see, the front piece is a lot more clumpy than the back. This is because my other brothers and sisters jumped in helped. But they didn't really know what they were doing and spread the plaster on too unevenly. I'll sand it off and it should be fine. My littlest brother, who's feet are in both pictures just got the biggest kick out of the whole project. I mean, how often do you get to see your sister stuck laying on the ground covered in plaster? He and my dad got out the didgeridoo and played drums on my back after it was almost hardened up.

Time to hit the reset button.

I decided to get into the freelance market through this website I found. After draining my checking account purchasing and registering a new car, I thought, maybe it's time to start getting a little more money flowing in there.

So, as I was going through all of the pictures I have on my computer to upload into a portfolio, I realized that most of my best work really wasn't what I wanted to upload. The projects that I've done for school, for example, are really painstakingly rendered and much, much more time and effort went into them, thus creating the better quality. Whereas, the pictures that I love, that I personally want to go back and look at, are just the little sketches of characters and story blips from my comics. The funny, sad thing about it is, that those comics are what take least priority in my life right now. After I finish my work, and school and homework and have cleaned up and gotten ready for the next day, all the energy and time that I would've used for those precious stories, is just spent away. 

(My main character) 

It kind of depressed me... but at the same time, I became a bit more motivated.

Tomorrow marks the start of my church's annual time of fasting. It's a time when we put down our physical needs, to reset our focus and priorities on God, as well as pray together. I am choosing to do a 3 day fast where I will only consume water and juices. 

I've done this several times before and what the most amazing thing about it is, is realizing exactly how much time I spend preparing to eat, eating and cleaning up after myself. Hopefully as well as what I said earlier, I can also use this as a chance to re-prioritize my time and get back into doing and excelling at the artwork that I love.

Wish me luck!

Yay!

Scanner's fixed!

Scanner induced change

Obviously this isn't finished. I just started tonight. I made the initial drawing in the beginning of January but I wasn't able to get it into the computer because my scanner was broken. Lame! I know. Technology that was made to save time ended up costing me a whole month of progress. Finally I just threw in the towel and redrew the image directly with my tablet. Normally I don't do my manga style work directly digital. I like the feel of the paper and pencil. 

Is it coming along good? Hard to tell at this stage, I know. But, you can kinda see where it's going, right?

Anyway, my thought on change is this: Change can occur in three different forms. 1) Desire, 2) Necessity and 3) Pressure. 

1) I draw with paper and pencil because I like it: Desire.

2) I switched to completely digital because my scanner wasn't working.

3) I made the decision to work completely digital because there is a time limit on the project.

Just a thought. I hope that this turns out good. 

The Lazy Artist

So, I've been working on my abstract plaster sculpture. And I find myself coming across a bit of an ethical dilemma. The sculpture will be passed on to one of my classmates to be re-worked. So, now that I'm at a decent phase, I want to throw the towel in and call it quits. I mean, it's going to get changed anyway, right? But then.... then comes that still small voice, saying "Do everything as if you were doing it unto the Lord and not men." So then, I did the human thing and.......... re-read the project rubric to find a loophole!.... Nothing. So I turned to you.... the blank page... At this point I'm really just trying to get my thoughts out. (And fill out my 100 word limit for the week. Ho ho ho!)
The way I figure it, this project is preparing me for the brutality that comes with submitting art into the system. Whether it's a gallery, a publishing house or even a mail in postcard competition, SOMEONE is going to tell me that my work can be better. Or, in the case of the publishing house, will want to change it.
Actually... that was written in the rubric. "Practice letting go of ownership and specific outcomes in the production of an artwork."
Darn you rubric!
So, this brings me back to my dilemma: Work long and hard to have your work smashed up and turned into something else, or put in your best effort, long into the night, sweat and tears pouring down your face- okay I'm just being dramatic. I know the answer. "Serve as if you were serving the Lord and not men." Even if it's going to get changed again, I won't develop unless I put my best effort into what I'm doing EVERY time... Every... single....time. This is a character building exercise!
OKAY, I'm going back to work.
Thank you blank page! Thank you people who are reading the now full page.

There it is.... good but not great.















I want to be great.

Copy cat.

So, here's me. And, here's my haircut... and my dirty mirror.
Can I call this art? Well, not really. I cut the bangs, but my mom did the major body of it, and I don't really take good care of it, and I didn't brush it and it's 9:00pm and.... Anyway, that's not really the point. 

This is my hairstyle... Why? 

Simply because it's on my head.

But the truth is, that this is (an attempt at) Nocchi's hairstyle! ->
My favorite singer/dancer from my favorite J-pop unit, "Perfume"!

 That aside....I got thinking about style.

As an artist, and especially a comic artist, I believe that it's majorly important to find one's own "style". Yet, I always find myself copying people. This was especially true when I first started drawing my own characters.

This screenshot is from one of my favorite shows. 

Note the incredibly large cow-licks........ Now see mine.

I think the comparison speaks for itself.

But when I look at my work, I can honestly say that I do have a distinct style. And you can look at this and say, those characters look nothing alike! Of course one can see the little bits and pieces that I've stolen from other books and shows but because those aspects are being filtered through my mind and translated through my hand into my characters they become mine. Much like Nocchi's haircut on my head becomes MY hair style.

Another way to think about it is like the development of a child. From the moment they are born they see the world around them and they see how people eat, walk, talk, etc. If babies never copied the actions of those around them, they would not develop properly. Either that, or they would develop much more slowly. So, coming back to style, I think that myself and others naturally want to be or act like the things and people we admire and that's okay, because style will develop when we emulate what we like, adapt it to what we're working with and make it our own. Style is our mind's translation what we've already seen. 

⁹ 

"The eye never has enough of seeing,

     nor the ear its fill of hearing.

    What has been will be again,
             what has been done will be done again;
                  there is nothing new under the sun."

            Ecclesiastes 1:9